In Shannon Burke’s novel, “Black Flies” he talks about an event that he claims occurs to all EMS personnel. First, I completely agree with his description and think that he gives a great insight into what happens when a person endures an ambulance call that has the potential to change the people involved. The job changes you and how you manage that change dictates if and how you progress in the job. It could make you better at providing care or turn you away from the job. In truth the above is not a strict dichotomy but is more of a continuum.

I recently learned about the deaths of two professional colleagues whom I knew and admired when I was an EMT. They were both senior to me and people I respected and admired. Unfortunately they both died from complications of alcohol over use. Presumably the emotional toll with years of human misery for some reason resulted in taking some solace in drinking. Maybe they might have been heavy drinkers before working in EMS, but what is endured by the average ambulance personnel will provide ample justification to find a way to take the edge off. It is a job and lifestyle that can get to you.

In My Ambulance Education I describe how a series of calls changed me gradually over time. The changes that occurred were incremental and pushed me towards a research career and away from working EMS in the streets. To be brutally frank, I did not like the person I was becoming while on the job. It was the beginnings of burnout that made me feel this way.

Over a series of calls told in the chapters of My Ambulance Education I ultimately burnt out. While this is a common occurrence in the EMS and paramedical fields it is a game changer for anyone trying to provide care to the urgent care patient. Although I have not been an EMT since circa 1993 my work and career has continued to try to help people.

My current patients are cared for by others, but I believe that I can help them by developing improved diagnostics and therapies. Now I work with other scientists as well as EMS personnel (who are in the trenches) all of us working to do research focused on benefit sick patients.